One of the many ways I plan to achieve financial independence is by answering a
few short questions. That’s what they want me to believe anyway. I’m talking
about surveys – the kind where they promise cash, prizes, whatever you desire
if you’ll just check off a few boxes. And that’s how it starts.
I have one email address
that gets mainly junk mail. It’s the one I use for promotions, drawings, and
recipes. The sidebar consists of about 15 custom folders filled with everything
from exercise tips (here’s a tip – don’t try to do yoga while holding a laptop)
to vacation ideas (notice I say ideas, not plans). It’s also the email that
every type of survey ever imagined manages to filter its way into. I try to
keep up with three different survey panels, and for a while I was doing pretty
well, managing to pull in a few small checks and gift cards, a toaster oven
(which has barely been used – should’ve held out for the automatic egg cooker)
and even some hotel stay points. Unfortunately, opportunity has been slipping
away lately. My inbox is overflowing due to lack of time and will continue to
do so until after we bring YK to college next week (and since the countdown is
now six days, you know that post is coming soon – I’m just trying
not to drench my keyboard in tears before the weekend). Not that
I expect to have plenty of time to do whatever I want after that – more likely
I’ll use them as a distraction for those times when I’m tearing my hair out
between visits to or from at least one of the girls.
Let me explain the
survey process.
“Take this survey and
earn points for cash and prizes,” they claim. I click on the little “Start”
icon and it begins.
Question 1: Have you
participated in any surveys in the last six months?
Answer: What? Of course
not. I don’t care what your stinkin’ records show – I’m clean, I tell ya!
Question 2: Name the
make, model and year of your automobiles.
Answer: Do they have to
be running? Do I count the ’68 Torino sitting on the side of the garage with
half a tree branch through the shredded convertible roof? This is getting
confusing.
Question 3: Have you
ever worked for any of the following types of businesses: Financial
institution; Retail store; Department of transportation; Circus.
Answer: Yes, No, No,
Every day of my life.
And then there are the
surveys that lead you through 45 minutes of questions (multiple choice,
essay, you name it) only to inform you that you are not qualified for this survey – or better yet – to announce they
have the sufficient amount of
participants. Well of course you do! That’s because it took me almost an
hour to get to this part!
Sometimes I try to play
the game of giving the “right” answers – those being the answers I believe they
are looking for. Nine times out of ten this backfires and I’m subsequently
kicked out of the survey. But – but - I was sure when they said to “select all that
apply” it would be more beneficial to check at least six out of eight different
brands of dryer sheets that I would be interested in testing. How could this
terminate my session?? Checking all eight would have been greedy, but I was
trying to give them options, dangit!
I’ve also discovered that
receiving cash for doing these surveys isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. My
original intention was to put the checks into a special account to save up for
vacations or something special we wanted to buy. Each time that $50 would
appear in the mail the “something special” would wind up being pesky little
things like groceries or gas. So I’m giving up the cash (that I never get to
spend) and rewarding myself with gift cards to restaurants and stores that we
like.
Seriously… who am I
kidding - I’ll find out what the kids want and send the gift cards to them.
Still, I’m sure I’ll get something out of all the time and effort I’ve put in
to answering these surveys.
Like my own personal indentation
on the sofa.
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